3am

And I don't mean the song by Matchbox 20 either. 3am and once again I am going without sleep. It seems to be more common than not lately. So many things to think about that even were I to write them down I would have still more to add to the list. All the niggling little details involved in packing up a life and trying to divest yourself of 8 years worth of belongings. Who will take what off my hands? Can I sell it or do I have to write it off and give it away -- which hurts when considering that these are often things I am going to need to repurchase on this left coast. I need to go back to bed. I need to let it go -- it will sort itself out eventually. But that doesn't make it easier to make my mind move on and let go.

Return

A return to Japan, a return to real life, a return to health. This year will hopefully be all about returning to the good side of life, and heading off in new, challenging, and potentially exciting directions. And as such, it seems appropriate to resurrect my blog. And so here it is. My beginning anew.

It seems only appropriate that as of late the weather in Vancouver has been spring-like. Flowers are blooming left, right and centre. It has been (mostly) sunny and reasonably warm. It is practically hanami time out here. And it is getting to be my time for getting out and doing things again.

I'll take it slow. Let's wait and see how it goes.

The Body Knows

At least, I think it seems to before I do. Generally, I don't think of someone who gets stressed about things, but lately, I think my body has decided to take me to task over the matter and inform me in no uncertain terms that I am so very wrong. Various health issues that all seemed to hit me at the same time suggest that perhaps I am stressing myself more than I know, and maybe I need to do something about it. But really, who wants to quit doing things?

Japanese Mysteries

On my way home from a kotatsu delivery yesterday, traffice slowed to an inexplicable pace nearing the high school. Slowly, we inched up the hill, all the while wondering what was going on? Must be a car accident with looky-loos unable to control themselves. Inching further forward, and no sign of flashing lights. Still wondering, still inching... And then, there it is. Hakusai!! (for those not aware, a kind of Chinese lettuce) Scattered all over the road. Smashed and smushed and half run over. And on the side of the road, a grandma with a basket darting in and out of traffic to try and rescue what she could.

***
At a school festival today, I watched small children perform bizarre little skits, forget lines, sing, dance and perform in the dark of the elementary school gym. Then, I caught a glimps of the toque the elderly fellow in front of me was wearing. "No, that can't be what it says. It's dark, he was moving -- I misread it." More singing, dancing, and still watching out of the corner of my eye to try and catch another glimpse of the patch on the front of his hat. "No!!! Seriously? That can't be right... No, it really does..."
What did it say? "Bitch Skateboards." Yeah baby, bring it.

***

Finally, at the same school festival was a young girl with these classic words emblazoned on her shirt, "Catch up with the man."

I wonder what she thinks you should do with the man after you catch up with him...

Moonless Moonlight

Looking across the river tonight, the treetops up the side of the hill are all coated in a sugaring of snow. Enough snow that I had to glance around to see where the glow was coming from. But, as it is a clear moonless night and the stars are thousands of miles away, it was only the glow of the snow against the dark blue sky that had my mind's eye playing tricks on me.

Fabulousness and All it Entails!

I am in one of those mental places where I have once again decided I am fabulous. Despite the various injuries I seem to be enduring, I am fabulous. I have work I need to do instead of this, but I always figure a little self-confidence doesn't hurt. And I also think a great many more of us could use the confidence!

Impulse Without Meaning

I have an urge. An urge to blog. I even had an idea -- a good idea -- for something to blog about. But, alas, alack, and och, that was on Thursday when I was driving to a conversation class. And *poof* it was gone. I haven't been able to dredge it out from the mush that was my mind. And yet, I have an impulse to blog. But nothing to say. I need to get out more, I think.

I really wish I could remember what I wanted to blog about on Thursday... I had the distinct impression it would be interesting and fun to type about.

Damn. Blame it on old age?

Mish Mash Splish Splash

On my way home from work today, I passed by one of my grade two students. She was 'skipping' along, but skipping feels like a word that is lacking in it's descriptive qualities. She was leaping from foot to foot, with her arms swinging out far and wide to the sides and over her head. Inhibitionless, that's the way to be.

Voyeurs Anonymous

What with only having just gotten internet installed (in my Japanese life, anyways), it has become even more disturbing to me the voyeuristic tendencies I am subject to. Now, I was never one to watch the reality shows -- the first ever season of Survivor, and some of the second were about the extent of it -- but I am definitely exhibiting inclinations. Not only that, I am inviting people in as well. Facebook and blogs, and whatever else... I wonder if that is why facebook has such success? Not the social networking thing, but our ill-concealed desire to find out what other people we know are doing. I mean, I have "friends" on Facebook that I am not sure I would consider friends in real life. Although, I am getting better about ignoring requests. I will admit to enjoying looking and reading to a certain extent to see what's going on. Primarily, I use it becuase so many people I know are so far away, and it is an easy way to keep in touch. And on occasion, it can even be inspiring, seeing where people have been or what they are trying. But half the time, it is just curiosity about someone I don't really know, with perhaps a smidge of occasional jealousy... Today, I ramble.

Procrastination and the Mastery Thereof...

It's not that hard, really, when you think about it (as is evidenced by this first line, meandering around and away and avast of any point I may actually have). Almost a science, really, but more of a magical science I think. You have to be willing to allow yourself to be captured by the big, the tiny, the infinitesimal, the underestimated, the overlooked, the vast, the beyond comprehension. In small doses or large, whatever catches the mind's eye and is able to carry it off into the nether reaches of your dusty mind. And of course, the most important part... It must be in lieu of the perceived necessary or important. But what's that they say about beholders and so forth? Maybe it is all part of the plan to enjoy being human... But none of this will help me get a Masters, will it?

Happy New Year!

Much belated new year's wishes to all. Unfortunately, I haven't really anything on my mind right now, so I am merely adding to the internet trash that is already out and about, running rampant through the ether (ether, now that is a word I have been wanting to use for a long time, and never seem to find appropriate opportunity).

First Days

Back at work and already wishing for a holiday. Not that I have long to wait, merely that patience is not my strong suit. And it isn't as if I am run off my feet this week, as both today and yesterday are at my smallest school -- an easy two classes a day. Tomorrow through Friday are all planned, and I only have to wonder and worry about January, however being out of it last week means I can push some lessons back into January and give myself some leeway. Maybe it is just because I am bored. I'd rather be skiing, cycling, walking, reading, listening to music, hanging out with friends, writing Christmas cards, packing, cooking, playing volleyball, playing badminton, enjoying some quality flirting, dancing, singing, playing drums, studying J-go, sleeping... Nearly anything, as vacation is so close I can nearly taste it, and there is no way work can compete right now.

Murmurs, Mumbles, and Meanderings

Welcome to my 151st post! And just to warn you, I have nothing to say! Ha-hah! I do however have a curious predilection that involves overusing my exclamation mark!!

My set for the Christmas party is polished off, and it looks like I have decided to make this one a venture into funk and motown. Get a little nostalgic, shall we? Although I can't even really claim it as my own nostalgia, being a bit too young. But I suppose listening to it on my parents' radio station throughout my childhood could claim some of this retro-reminiscing as my own?

I have to say I am actually nervous about this one, and not entirely because I am unsure how my set will go down, but also because of one of the boys I am bringing. The same day I get to check him out on the drums, he gets to check me out on the decks. Here's hoping it goes so well as I should like it to...

I am currently sporting a new coiffure, short and sporty looking, with just the right amount of sass to keep me happy. Not nearly as pleased with this cut though as I was with the last one, as the hairdresser persisted in using those horrible thinning scissors that my hair desperately doesn't need. Next time, I will definitely ward her off, paying due heed to the words of wisdom Diane uttered.

Diane and Hiro's house is coming along very well. To repeat a statement I made many times wandering through the framing, it's absolutely huge! Looking forward to seeing this when it's done, and can completely appreciate the enthusiasm with which Hiro is filiming every step of the way.

Christmas shopping is nearly done -- the only person left to shop for is my father, and I am once again stymied. Books? Tools? Music? Clothes? Who knows? And I will only have 1 day after I arrive in Canada to take care of it, flying in as I do on the 23rd. Lord loves shopping that close to Christmas...

Adventures in badminton last week have shown me that I may be better at badminton than I am at volleyball, or they could have shown me that the people I was playing with are worse at badminton than I am. I am not sure yet which way I should lean on this, although my spike (volleyball) is getting better, but my serve remains weak.

The Christmas party is 3 days off and I am looking forward to it, however slightly less than normal as one of my favourite Yonago boys will be missing as he visits a very ill grandmother. Here's wishing him a safe flight home and hoping things go as well as they can.

Helter Skelter

... but without the summer swelter. With the winter freeze doesn't sound nearly as good though.

Once again, back to being wanted as a mail came hither today informing me that a neighboring town next to where I used to live is interested in having me work there. It's always nice when people give you good press.

Multiple nabe parties in the here and then, as three weeks straight have been occupied by parties devoted to this ubiquitous and comfort-food style dish, the most recent being Sunday night just past. After a semi-disastrous bowling outing -- no, I didn't accidentally toss the ball backwards like I have done in the past, I merely sucked horrendously in the first game (57!?!) but made up for it a bit by the second (102, not great but whatever), only to walk away with a set of garbage bags and a 500 yen certificate for anything I want. A crew of volleyballers primarily, we managed to make more than our share of gutterballs, single pin knockdowns and the occasional spares and even more elusive strikes. Followed by a quality meal at Tomato Onion, paid for by Niimi Wellness (I truly don't understand how they can afford to do this, as the whole day only cost me 500 yen, and I got my bowling paid for, a 500 yen set of trash bags, a 500 yen certificate, and a free lunch out of the deal), we headed back to Niimi for a nabe party at Datte's that night. Originally intended as a night out drinking, they shifted gears and decided to do nabe and beer instead when I informed them I was short of funding. Seriously, it is great when people love you. Especially when they go into the grocery store, and knowing that you don't drink beer, buy several of your faourite "Cocktail Partner" -- can you have a favourite cocktail partner? -- as well as one of every other flavour on the shelf. I would put money on one of these guys having a crush on me.

Conversation devolved into playing and drawing at the party as we all started messing around with Datte's 1 year old daughter's toys. It also lead into discussions of blood type's, which as we all know is used and believed in more than horoscopes and star signs are at home. Being a B myself, apparently quasi-rare in Japan, seems to mean that I am prone to being lost in myself, or self-centred if you want to go with the negative spin on it. I'm not sure how accurate I would say that is, however I seemed to prove their point when every once in a while when conversation flowed too rapidly or came from too many directions, I stopped paying attention. I tried to explain that it can make a person tired, focussing and thinking in another language constantly, but I don't think they believed me. Way to help perpetuate a stereotype, Nico. Or I just don't want to cop to it.

If you are curious, I get the feeling Type B is considered the worst to have. According to the Wiki (bow down before the all-knowing and sometimes erroneous Wiki!!), I am:

Best Traits: Creative and passionate. Animal loving. Optimistic and flexible. Individualist.
Worst Traits: Forgetful, irresponsible, and self-centered.

I will definitely give them the forgetful... The other ones, who knows.

And if this has whetted your curiosity, here is what the Wiki says about you...

Type A
Best Traits: Conservative, introverted, reserved, patient, punctual, and perfectionist.
Worst Traits: Obsessive, stubborn, self conscious, and uptight.

Type AB
Best Traits: Cool, controlled, rational. Sociable and popular. Empathic.
Worst Traits: Aloof, critical, indecisive and unforgiving.

Type O
Best Traits: Ambitious, athletic, robust and self-confident. Natural leaders
Worst Traits: Arrogant, vain and insensitive. Ruthless

Stressing and De-Stressing

Go to work. Laugh and joke with the staff. Bite my tongue at another school. Bring it home at the end of the day. Spend a couple of hours planning lessons for the next day, the next school. Sorting out supplies and materials. Look in my wallet, and decline the dinner and party invitations. Scrounge supplies and cook dinner with whatever I can find. Listen to some good music. Worry about studying, without actually doing it. Cook some dinner, wash some dishes. Find some time to do laundry. Talk to my neighbor and listen to her complain about work and life in Niimi. Go for a jog. Enjoy a hot shower. Try to avoid the assault of the kame-mushi which seem to be out in droves this year -- apparent predictors of heavy snowfall come winter. Get up early and race out to meet everyone for a volleyball tournament. Attempt not to laugh out loud during opening ceremony while Kishi-kun stands in front of me, sending sidelong glances and quietly laughing. Get scolded by a friend behind for the obvious repressed laughter that has my shoulders shaking. Win a couple volleyball games, lose a couple. Chatting with Tama-chan about last night's okonomiyaki, and how I should meet her parents. (I hope this isn't a reversion to people thinking I am gay again? Seriously, just cause someone doesn't date much...) Joining a 70 person long single line "wave" as everyone cheers for the most unsportsmanlike team who ends up winning the tournament. Line up, once again ending up behind Kishi-kun during closing ceremony, who makes me withhold my laughter once more, but this time my scolding friend behind joins in. Listen to stories in the car about poor Kuma-chan while trying to catch up on some sleep. Getting caught not sleeping when the conversation takes strange turns and I burst out laughing. Wedding and marriage discussions while someone listens intently without trying to seem so. A declaration from me that there is no way I am going back in a different car, as I don't even want to imagine what they will discuss if I am not here. A perverse keyboard that doesn't have a warm and friendly relationship with the letter "V." Volleyball practice that goes reasonably well. Getting better and feeling slightly more confident, but still don't know exactly where I am supposed to be and when. Plans made for a nabe party on upcoming culture day with the boys who make me laugh in return for the takoyaki fest of a few weeks ago. Cycles about town in an attempt to save on gas, get up off of my ass, and get a better look around. Halloween party preparation. Listening to hundreds of songs in an attempt to make a set that will keep me happy. Laundry -- when the hell am I going to get that done? Cleaning, sure, let me call my maid. And people wonder why I don't invite them oer more often. Snow tires and my lack thereof, accompanied by stories from all my schools about how impassable routes to 3 of my schools will become in a month or so. Chatting with missed friends in Yonago about weather, work and wellness. Partaking of some homemade 梅酒 acquired from a friendly teacher. Enjoying some gorgeous fresh veggies from someone's garden. Munching on some delicious Frankenstein-sized grapes, a 名物 of Niimi. Worrying about how I have been out of touch with people I love for far too long. Wishing I had more time to read, but getting home too tired to care. And now? Who knows...

Almost off Hiatus

But without regular and relaxed access to a computer -- at least not until I buy myself one -- the hiatus may continue in intermittent spurts or long pauses. Who knows...

Anyways, the new house is fabulous (again, excepting the toilet, but whatever as I got a toilet for my birthday from the fabulous Elle s'appelles and Cheap Haji which means no more squatting!! Woohoo! A bottle of wine was cracked in celebration and the toilet was soon christened), it's only the neighbours that could drive me to distraction. The bugs that find their way in and I have no idea how... I am actually sort of longing for the winter freeze which will force them into hibernation.

The new town (technically, it is a city, but who are they kidding??) is pretty good as well. I have been enjoying the air conditioning provided by my neighbouring river, as well as the cycling around and checking things out.

The job is the only thing I am not sure about yet -- 7 schools has me pausing. The teachers are fabulous however, going out of their way to talk to me or hunt me down some suitable olleyball teams to join -- one was found; a team of 20 - 30 year olds who like to drink and aren't too serious about the game, whom I shall meet as soon as I manage to hunt down the gym. And the kids I have met so far are lovely and eager and shy, so it will be interesting and challenging I think. Excited and experiencing a little trepidation...

Off to aisatsu the BOE now, so sayonara!

Theory

I have a theory that George Lucas spent some quality time in Japan before making the Star Wars movies. It is not a particularly profound or deep theory -- purely superficial. Would you like to know what inspired me to this? The Jedi. The Jedi knights, Jedi mind power, return of... The word Jedi is incredibly similiar to the Japanese word for the Self-Defence Forces. 自衛隊(じえいたい or jieitai if you prefer the Roman letters) is often pronounced to this crazy foreigner's ears to sound a lot like Jedi, which always leaves my mind quietly whispering, "May the force be with you..."

Experiments with Annoyance

Not quite a month ago, I was proclaiming blogger beautiful, and now, now...

I haven't been able to see or access my last couple of posts from my blog, only from the control panel after logging in, and am wondering if it is just me. In an exercise in futility, I am posting yet another to see if mere volume of backlog could cause it then to burst forth from the fiberoptic ether. But, I doubt it. I imagine I have gone and foolishly done something to cause a permanent hiatus in my posts. Although I can't say I mind too much as it will give me a chance to brush up on my language skills and dwindling vocab.

Validation

...even if not my own.

In conversation with Diane the other night over a delicious salad and some yummy risotto (even if you didn't use the real rice, it was very delicious and I will have to get the recipe off of you), she mentioned an activity she had recently done with some of her high school students. In an attempt to make them practice using, "My favourite ~ is --," she had them write some sentences. Apparently two boys turned in papers with the sentence, "My favourite teacher is Rachael." Rachael was in her second and last year way back when I was in my first, working solely in elementary schools in Yonago. It's always nice to find out that what we do here has some kind of lasting effect on the kids we are in touch with.

And before Rachael left, I told her that when I grow up, I would like to be like her. Hasn't happened yet -- either the growing up or the being more like her...

More Fireflies

Going jogging along Hoshoji River last night at half past nine, I saw more fireflies than I have ever seen in my entire life. Dotting the riverbanks on both sides, apparating in the midst of rushes, even going so far as to visit neighbouring rice fields. It made for a well-lit night, as the moon was full and suggestive of autumn harvests.